“Alternative” Lyrics 171

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Spies; Republicans; Republican Party; Oliver North; NRA; Iran; Qatar; Saudi Arabia; Fox News
“Ollie North” by Seth MacFarlane from American Dad

Stan: In the 80s there was Cold War drama.
We fought the Commies inside Nicaragua.
Our friends were the Contras. Freedom was their mantra.
So we sent them lots of money for guns and landmines.

But Congress stopped the Contra money flow
Just ’cause they moved a teeny bit of blow.
But then a hero came forth.
His name was Oliver North.
He and Reagan went around the sissy Congress.

OLLIE NORTH! OLLIE NORTH!

Stan (speaking): You see, North secretly sold missiles to a harmless country called Iran who would always be a grateful ally. Then he gave the profits to the Contras. Genius!

Stan: But the sales were uncovered by the press.

Contras: Awwww.

Press: He he.

Stan: Reagan and North began to stress.

Reagan: Well…

North: Nyaay!

Stan: ‘Cause what they did was technically high treason! (But it was totally justified.)

Stan: North volunteered to take the blame,
to save Reagan from prison rape shame.
The truth he did bury with his hot secretary.
Thanks to her shredder, he got off totally scot-free!

OLLIE NORTH! OLLIE NORTH!

He’s a soldier!
And a hero!
And a novelist!
And now he’s on Fox News!

Roger: Crap, that’s the end.

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“Alternative” Lyrics 131

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; Donald J. Trump’s Base; NRA; Minors; Mass Shootings; Resistance
“Concrete Angel” by Martina McBride

She walks to school with the lunch
She packed
Nobody knows what she’s
Holdin’ back

Wearin’ the same dress
She wore yesterday
She hides the bruises with linen
And lace

(Oh oh)

The teacher wonders but she
Doesn’t ask
It’s hard to see the pain
Behind the mask
Bearing the burden
Of a secret storm
Sometimes she wishes she was
Never born

Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In her world that she can rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where
She’s loved
Concrete angel

Somebody cries in the middle
Of the night
The neighbors hear, but they turn
Out the lights
A fragile soul caught in the hands
Of fate
When morning comes
It’ll be too late

Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In her world that she can rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where
She’s loved
Concrete angel

A statue stands in a shaded place
An angel girl with an upturned face
A name is written on a polished rock
A broken heart that the world forgot

Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In her world that she can rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where
She’s loved
Concrete angel

“Alternative” Lyrics 116

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; NRA
Auxiliary Topic: Godless Heathens; NRA
“You’re an Ocean” by Fastball

Can you make it easier for me to understand
How you’re holding my heart, in your trembling hands…
Eyes that rise to meet me half way up among the stars,
You may be from Venus but I’m definitely not from Mars

You’re an ocean, you’re an ocean
Settle down, settle down, what’s the commotion?
I’m an island, but you’re an ocean
It’s a stormy sea of love and emotion
You’ve got me suspended motionless in time

Make the warm winds circle round my head just like you do
If I could do it, I’d be doing it to you
I believe I’d buy whatever you would sell to me
Nothing in my life ever came with a guarantee

You’re an ocean, you’re an ocean
Settle down, settle down, what’s the commotion?
I’m an island, but you’re an ocean
It’s a stormy sea of love and emotion
You’ve got me suspended motionless in time

I believe I’d buy whatever you would sell to me
Nothing in my life ever came with a guarantee

You’re an ocean, you’re an ocean
Settle down, settle down, what’s the commotion?
I’m an island, but you’re an ocean
It’s a stormy sea of love and emotion
You’ve got me suspended motionless

You’ve got me suspended motionless
You’ve got me suspended motionless in time

“Alternative” Lyrics 111

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; NRA; Donald J. Trump’s Base; Mass Murderers
“We Both Reached for the Gun” from Chicago

Mr. Billy Flynn in the press conference
Notice his mouth never moves, almost

Where’d you come from?
Mississippi
And your parents?
Very wealthy
Where are they now?
Six feet under

But she was granted one more start
The convent of The Sacred Heart

When’d you get here?
1920
How old were you?
Don’t remember
Then what happened?
I met Amos and he stole my heart away
Convinced me to elope one day

A convent girl! A run-away marriage!
Oh, it’s too terrible, you poor, poor dear

Who’s Fred Casely?
My ex-boyfriend
Why’d you shoot him?
I was leavin’
Was he angry?
Like a madman
Still I said, “Fred, move along”

She knew that she was doin’ wrong

Then describe it
He came toward me
With a pistol?
From my bureau
Did you fight him?
Like a tiger

He had strength and she had none

And yet we both reached for the gun
Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, we both, oh yes we both
Oh yes, we both reached for the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun
Oh yes, we both reached for the gun, for the gun

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, they both, oh yes, they both
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun, for the gun

Understandable, understandable
Yes, it’s perfectly understandable
Comprehensible, comprehensible
Not a bit reprehensible, it’s so defensible

How’re you feeling?
Very frightened
Are you sorry?
Are you kidding?
What’s you’re statement?
All I’d say is, though my choo-choo jumped the track
I’d give my life to bring him back

And?
Stay away from
What?
Jazz and liquor
And?
And the men who
What?
Play for fun

And what?
That’s the thought that
Yeah
Came upon me
When?
When we both reached for the gun

Understandable, understandable
Yes, it’s perfectly understandable
Comprehensible, comprehensible
Not a bit reprehensible, it’s so defensible

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, they both, oh yes, they both
(Let me hear it!)
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun, for the gun
(Little louder)

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, they both, oh yes they both
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun, for the gun
(Now you got it)

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, they both, oh yes they both
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun
Oh yes, they both reached for the gun, for the gun

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, they both
Oh yes, they both, oh yes, they both reached for the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun

(Both reached for the gun)
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun
Both reached for the gun

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