“Alternative” Lyrics 110

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family; Republicans; Donald J. Trump’s Base
“Beggars at the Feast” from Les Misérables

Thenardier
Ain’t it a laugh?
Ain’t it a treat?
Hob-nobbin’ here
Among the elite?
Here comes a prince
There goes a Jew.
This one’s a queer
But what can you do?
Paris at my feet
Paris in the dust
And here I’m breaking bread
With the upper crust!
Beggar at the feast!
Master of the dance!
Life is easy pickings
If you grab your chance.
Everywhere you go
Law-abiding folk
Doing what is decent
But they’re mostly broke!
Singing to the Lord on Sundays
Praying for the gifts He’ll send.

M. and Mme. Thenardier
But we’re the ones who take it
We’re the ones who make it in the end!
Watch the buggers dance
Watch ’em till they drop
Keep your wits about you
And you stand on top!
Masters of the land
Always get our share
Clear away the barricades
And we’re still there!
We know where the wind is blowing
Money is the stuff we smell
And when we’re rich as Croesus
Jesus! Won’t we see you all in hell!

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“Alternative” Lyrics 101

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Devin Nunes; Trey Gowdy; Bob Corker; Jeff Flake; Orrin Hatch; Jason Chaffetz; Et Alii
Auxiliary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Vladimir Putin
Tertiary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family; Jared Kushner
Quaternary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Nikki Haley; Hope Hicks; Sean Spicer; Jeff Sessions; Brenda Fitzgerald; Paul Manafort; George Papadopoulos; Michael Flynn; Rick Gates; Andrew McCabe, Et Alii
Quinary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Ivana Zelníčková; Marla Maples; Melania Trump; Stormy Daniels/Stephanie Gregory Clifford
“Better Dig Two” by the Band Perry

I told you on the day we wed
I was gonna love you ’til I’s dead
Made you wait ’til our wedding night
That’s the first and the last time I wear white

So if the ties that bind ever do come loose
Tie them in a knot like a hangman’s noose
‘Cause I’ll go to heaven or I’ll go to hell
Before I’ll see you with someone else

Put me in the ground
Put me six foot down
And let the stone say:

Here lies the girl whose only crutch
Was loving one man just a little too much
If you go before I do
I’m gonna tell the gravedigger that he better dig two

Well,
It won’t be whiskey, won’t be meth
It’ll be your name on my last breath
If divorce or death ever do us part
The coroner will call it a broken heart

So put me in the ground
Put me six foot down
And let the stone say:

Here lies the girl whose only crutch
Was loving one man just a little too much
If you go before I do
I’m gonna tell the gravedigger that he better dig two

Dig two
Ooh, ooh

I took your name when I took those vows
I meant ’em back then and I mean ’em right now,
Oh, right now

If the ties that bind ever do come loose
If forever ever ends for you
If that ring gets a little too tight
You might as well read me my last rights

And let the stone say:

Here lies the girl whose only crutch
Was loving one man just a little too much
If you go before I do
Gonna tell the gravedigger that he better dig, uh!

Heavy stone right next to mine,
We’ll be together ’til the end of time
Don’t you go before I do,
I’m gonna tell the gravedigger that he better dig two

I told you on the day we wed
I was gonna love you ’til I’s dead

“Alternative” Lyrics 93

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Stephanie Gregory Clifford/Stormy Daniels; Ivanka Trump
“My Girl” by the Temptations

I’ve got sunshine
On a cloudy day
When it’s cold outside
I’ve got the month of May

I guess you’d say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl, my girl, my girl
Talkin’ ’bout my girl
My girl

I’ve got so much honey
The bees envy me
I’ve got a sweeter song
Than the birds in the trees

Well, I guess you’d say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl, my girl, my girl
Talkin’ ’bout my girl
My girl
Ooo-ooo, hoo-ooo

Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Ooh yeah

I don’t need no money
Fortune or fame
I got all the riches, baby
One man can claim

Well, I guess you’d say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl, my girl, my girl
Talkin’ ’bout my girl
My girl

I got sunshine on a cloudy day with my girl
I’ve even got the month of May with my girl
Talkin’ bout, talkin’ ’bout, talkin’ ’bout my girl

“Alternative” Lyrics 75

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Vladimir Putin
Auxiliary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family; Upper-class
“Part of Your World” by Jodi Benson from The Little Mermaid

Look at this stuff, isn’t it neat?
Wouldn’t you think my collection’s complete?
Wouldn’t you think I’m the girl
The girl who has everything?

Look at this trove, treasures untold
How many wonders can one cavern hold?
Looking around here you’d think
Sure, she’s got everything

I’ve got gadgets and gizmos a plenty
I’ve got whozits and whatzits galore
You want thingamabobs? I’ve got twenty!
But who cares? No big deal
I want more

I wanna be where the people are
I wanna see, wanna see them dancing

Walking around on those
What do you call ’em? Oh, feet

Flipping your fins you don’t get too far
Legs are required for jumping, dancing
Strolling along down a
What’s that word again?
Street

Up where they walk, up where they run
Up where they stay all day in the sun
Wandering free
Wish I could be, part of that world

What would I give if I could live
Out of these waters?
What would I pay to spend a day
Warm on the sand

Betcha’ on land, they understand
Bet they don’t reprimand their daughters
Bright young women, sick of swimming
Ready to stand

I’m ready to know what the people know
Ask ’em my questions
And get some answers
What’s a fire and why does it?
What’s the word?
Burn

When’s it my turn?
Wouldn’t I love, love to explore that shore up above
Out of the sea
Wish I could be
Part of that world

“Alternative” Lyrics 73

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans
Auxiliary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Donald J. Trump’s Campaign Team; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Trump Family; Republicans; Robert Mueller
Tertiary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Politicians; Vladimir Putin
“Take the Money and Run” by the Steve Miller Band

Hoo-hoo
This is a story about Billy Joe and Bobbie Sue
Two young lovers with nothin’ better to do
Than sit around the house, get high, and watch the tube
And here is what happened when they decided to cut loose
They headed down to, ooh, old El Paso
That’s where they ran into a great big hassle
Billy Joe shot a man while robbing his castle
Bobbie Sue took the money and run

Hoo-hoo-hoo, go on, take the money and run
Go on, take the money and run
Hoo-hoo-hoo, go on, take the money and run
Go on, take the money and run

Hoo-hoo-hoo, Billy Mack is a detective down in Texas
You know he knows just exactly what the facts is
He ain’t gonna let those two escape justice
He makes his livin’ off of the people’s taxes
Bobbie Sue, whoa, whoa, she slipped away
Billy Joe caught up to her the very next day

They got the money, hey, you know they got away
They headed down south and they’re still running today
Singin’ go on take the money and run

Go on, take the money and run
Hoo-hoo-hoo, go on, take the money and run
Oh lord, go on, take the money and run
Hoo-hoo-hoo
Hey, yeah, go on, take the money and run, yeah (yeah)
Hoo-hoo-hoo, go on, take the money and run
Oh lord, go on, take the money and run, yeah (yeah)
Hoo-hoo-hoo, go on, take the money and run, oh lord

“Alternative” Lyrics 70

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family; Politicians
“Celebrity” by Brad Paisley

Someday I’m gonna be famous, do I have talent well no
These days you don’t really need it thanks to reality shows
Can’t wait to date a supermodel, can’t wait to sue my dad
Can’t wait to wreck a Ferrari on my way to rehab

‘Cause when you’re a celebrity
It’s adios reality
You can act just like a fool
People think you’re cool
Just ’cause you’re on TV
I can throw a major fit
When my latte isn’t just how I like it
When they say I’ve gone insane
I’ll blame it on the fame
And the pressures that go with
Being a celebrity

I’ll get to cry to Barbara Walters when things don’t go my way
And I’ll get community service no matter which law I break
I’ll make the supermarket tabloids, they’ll write some awful stuff
But the more they run my name down the more my price goes up

‘Cause when you’re a celebrity
It adios reality
No matter what you do
People think you’re cool
Just ’cause you’re on TV
I can fall in and out of love
Have marriages that barely last a month
When they go down the drain
I’ll blame it on the fame
And say it’s just so tough
Being a celebrity

So let’s hitch up the wagons and head out west
To the land of the fun and the sun
We’ll be real world bachelor jackass millionaires
Hey hey Hollywood here we come

‘Cause when you’re a celebrity
It adios reality
No matter what you do
People think you’re cool
Just ’cause you’re on TV

“Alternative” Lyrics 63

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family
“Lifestyles of the Not So Rich and Famous” by Tracy Byrd

Honey they’re bringin’ out a TV crew
They want to do a story ’bout me and you
They’ll be stringin’ up bright lights in the backyard
There’ll be cameras on their shoulders
We’ll be readin’ cue cards
Leave them long johns on the line
If the kids look dirty, that’ll be just fine

They’re gonna put us on
Lifestyles of the not so rich and famous
They want to see us go hog wild
Over beans and barbecue
They want to see my Fairlane up on blocks
The holes in all our socks
Talkin’ ’bout lifestyles of the not so rich and famous

Tell ’em bout your mama and the bowling league
Tell ’em bout junior and his baseball team
I’ll show ’em my nine point buck on the wall
I’ll blow a few times on my new duck call
Let ’em see ol’ blue how he sleeps all day
We’ll bring out the Elvis TV trays

They’re gonna put us on
Lifestyles of the not so rich and famous
They want to see us go hog wild
Over beans and barbecue
They want to see my Fairlane up on blocks
The holes in all our socks
Talkin’ ’bout lifestyles of the not so rich and famous

Yeah our idea of high class livin’
Is sittin’ on the porch on a cool night
Our Champagne and Caviar
Is an RC cola and a moon pie

I’m talkin’ ’bout lifestyles of the not so rich and famous
Lifestyles of the not so rich and famous

“Alternative” Lyrics 62

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family; Republicans
“The Kids Aren’t Alright” by the Offspring

When we were young the future was so bright
The old neighborhood was so alive
And every kid on the whole damn street
Was gonna make it big and not be beat

Now the neighborhood’s cracked and torn
The kids are grown up but their lives are worn
How can one little street
Swallow so many lives

[Chorus]
Chances blown
Nothing’s free
Longing for what used to be
Still it’s hard
Hard to see
Fragile lives, shattered dreams

Jamie had a chance, well she really did
Instead she dropped out and had a couple of kids
Mark still lives at home cause he’s got no job
He just plays guitar and smokes a lot of pot

Jay committed suicide
Brandon OD’d and died
What the hell is going on
The cruelest dream, reality

[Chorus x2]

“Alternative” Lyrics 58

Topic: Donald J. Trump Jr.; Julian Assange; Wikileaks; Robert Mueller; Donald J. Trump; Trump Family
Auxiliary Topic: Republicans; Citizens of the United States of America
“Talk to Me” by Stephen Lynch

I came down to the breakfast table
Felt like I could die
I tried so hard, but wasn’t able
To look you in the eye
For I am feeling so much shame
Yes I have brought disgrace
Could tell I soiled my good name
By the look upon your face.

Well it seems last night you caught me spanking it
No use denying it, I was really cranking it
Well dry your eyes, don’t be so sad
If you could just forgive me, and talk to me, dad
Talk to me dad

I didn’t hear you enter, no I didn’t hear the door
With my hand upon my member and my pants upon the floor
Now burnt to your brain is an image you despise
Like blood and guts and starving kids and Stevie Wonder’s eyes

Well it seems last night you caught me spanking it
No use denying it, I was really cranking it
Well dry your eyes, don’t be so sad
But I wouldn’t use those tissues; they’ve already been had
Talk to me dad

The look upon your face made my swollen glad diminish
So I said “could you close the door, I really wanna finish.”
Now daddy, I’m ashamed and I completely understand
If you never wanna hug again or even shake my hand

Well it seems last night you caught me spanking it
No use denying it, I was really cranking it
Well dry your eyes, don’t be so sad
Just because it was your bed, it’s not that bad

When I was only 17 you told me it was dirty
So it must be really creepy when you kid is pushing 30
But you cannot tell me, dad, you have never had a whack
At the thing that hangs below your belt and bumps into your sack

Well it seems last night you caught me spanking it
No use denying it, I was really cranking it
Well dry your eyes, don’t be so sad
But I wouldn’t use those tissues, they’ve already been
Just because it was your bed it’s not that
Oh daddy, daddy, please forgive me, and talk to me, dad
Talk to me dad

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