Tag: Lyrics

“Alternative” Lyrics 70

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family; Politicians
“Celebrity” by Brad Paisley

Someday I’m gonna be famous, do I have talent well no
These days you don’t really need it thanks to reality shows
Can’t wait to date a supermodel, can’t wait to sue my dad
Can’t wait to wreck a Ferrari on my way to rehab

‘Cause when you’re a celebrity
It’s adios reality
You can act just like a fool
People think you’re cool
Just ’cause you’re on TV
I can throw a major fit
When my latte isn’t just how I like it
When they say I’ve gone insane
I’ll blame it on the fame
And the pressures that go with
Being a celebrity

I’ll get to cry to Barbara Walters when things don’t go my way
And I’ll get community service no matter which law I break
I’ll make the supermarket tabloids, they’ll write some awful stuff
But the more they run my name down the more my price goes up

‘Cause when you’re a celebrity
It adios reality
No matter what you do
People think you’re cool
Just ’cause you’re on TV
I can fall in and out of love
Have marriages that barely last a month
When they go down the drain
I’ll blame it on the fame
And say it’s just so tough
Being a celebrity

So let’s hitch up the wagons and head out west
To the land of the fun and the sun
We’ll be real world bachelor jackass millionaires
Hey hey Hollywood here we come

‘Cause when you’re a celebrity
It adios reality
No matter what you do
People think you’re cool
Just ’cause you’re on TV

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“Alternative” Lyrics 69

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans
Auxilary Topic: Ajit Pai; FCC
“The Way” by Fastball

They made up their minds
And they started packing
They left before the sun came up that day
An exit to eternal summer slacking
But where were they going without ever
Knowing the way?

They drank up the wine
And they got to talking
They now had more important things to say
And when the car broke down they started walking
Where were they going without ever
Knowing the way?

[Chorus:]
Anyone can see the road that they walk on
Is paved in gold
And it’s always summer
They’ll never get cold
They’ll never get hungry
They’ll never get old and grey
You can see their shadows wandering off somewhere
They won’t make it home
But they really don’t care
They wanted the highway
They’re happier there today, today

Their children woke up
And they couldn’t find them
They left before the sun came up that day
They just drove off and left it all behind ’em
But where were they going without ever
Knowing the way?

[Chorus]

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“Alternative” Lyrics 68

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Politicians
“Baggage Claim” by Miranda Lambert

I have been draggin’ around your sensitive ego
Making sure that your bags arrive on time for the dog and pony show
Leather suitcase like a brick, it kinda makes it hard to get a good grip
I drop your troubles off at the conveyor belt, I hand you a ticket to go get it yourself

At the baggage claim, you got a lot of luggage in your name
When you hit the ground, check the lost and found
‘Cause it ain’t my problem now
I can’t carry it on, I got a lot of troubles of my own
It’s all over the yard, in the trunk of the car
I’m packin’ it in so come and get it

If it ain’t obvious what has set me off today
Behind every woman scorned is a man who made her that way
Go on and take your little business trip with that sweet little habit that you can’t kick
You better call your momma when you get to town ’cause I ain’t gonna be hangin’ around

At the baggage claim, you got a lot of luggage in your name
When you hit the ground, check the lost and found
Because it ain’t my problem now
I can’t carry it on, I’ve got a lot of troubles of my own
It’s all over the yard, in the trunk of the car
And I’m packin’ it in so come and get it

Come and pick it up, pick it up
Before I blow it up in flames
You better pick it up, pick it up
Baby, I’m leaving everything

At the baggage claim, you got a lot of luggage in your name
And when you hit the ground, check the lost and found
Because it ain’t my problem now
I can’t carry it on, I’ve got a lot of troubles of my own
It’s all over the yard, in the trunk of the car
Well, I’m packin’ it in so come and get it

Come and get it

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“Alternative” Lyrics 67

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Donald J. Trump’s Base
“Bait a Hook” by Justin Moore

I heard you had to drive him home after two umbrella drinks
I heard he’s got a Prius, ’cause he’s into bein’ green
My buddies said he saw y’all, eatin’ that sushi stuff
Baby that don’t sound like you,
That don’t sound like love,
Sounds like it sucks

He can’t even bait a hook
He can’t even skin a buck
He don’t know who Jack Daniels is
He ain’t ever drove a truck
Knows how to throw out a line,
But not the kind in a field and stream book
No darlin’ I ain’t even worried,
You’ll come runnin’ back
He can’t even bait a hook

Has he kissed you in a hay field
As the sumer rain falls down?
Has he took you to meet his mama,
Back in his home town?
Does he drive the interstate,
Or take them old back roads?
Can he melt your heart with a country song,
Every good old boy should know?
I didn’t think so

He can’t even bait a hook
He can’t even skin a buck
He don’t know who Jack Daniels is
He ain’t ever drove a truck
Knows how to throw out a line,
But not the kind in a field and stream book
No darlin’ I ain’t even worried,
You’ll come runnin’ back
He can’t even bait a hook

It won’t be that long, ’till you start gettin’ bored
I’ll be smilin’ on the river, realin’ in one more

He can’t even bait a hook
He can’t even skin a buck
Hell he don’t know who Jack Daniels is
He ain’t ever drove a truck
Knows how to throw out a line,
But not the kind in a field and stream book
No darlin’ I ain’t even worried,
‘Cause you’ll come runnin’ back
He can’t even bait a hook
No baby I ain’t even worried
He can’t even bait a hook

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“Alternative” Lyrics 66

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Vladimir Putin; Deutsche Bank
“Leader of the Laundromat” by the Detergents

Is he really goin’ out with ‘er? I don’t know. Look, here he comes now. Let’s ask
‘im. Hey, Murray, is it true Betty’s wearin’ your ring? Uh-huh.
Who’s that bangin’ on the piano? I don’t know. You goin’ out with
her tonight? You bet yer fur. By the way, where’d ya meet her?

I met her one day at the Laundromat.
She turned around and smiled at me, ya get the picture? (Yes, we see).
And that’s when I fell in love with the Leader Of the Laundromat

My folks were always putting her down (down, down)
Because her laundry came back brown (brown, brown)
I don’t care if they think she’s bad
I fell in love ’cause she looked so sad
I got a date tonight with the Leader Of the Laundromat

(Dang it!)

My dad said “Find a laundry that’s new” (find a laundry that’s new)
How can I tell my baby we’re through (tell my baby we’re through)
Gotta drive right into town
I don’t care if my shirts are brown
I got a date tonight with the Leader Of the Laundromat

(Dang it!)

When I finally got there, I told her it was all over between us. I’ll never forget the
hurt and the funny look in her eye. She grabbed my laundry and ran into the street,
directly into the path of a runaway garbage truck. I yelled “watch out, watch out,
watch out, watch out, watch ou-ou-t”

(Dang it!)

I felt so messy standing there (messy standing there)
My daddy’s shorts were everywhere (daddy’s shorts were everywhere)
Tenderly I kissed her goodbye
Picked up my clothes, they were finally dry
But I won’t forget you, oh Leader Of the Laundromat

(oh-oh-oh-oh)

(ooh–ooh—ooh—ooh)

(Who’s that bangin’ on the piano?
I don’t know.)

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