“Alternative” Lyrics 47

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Trump Family; Donald J. Trump’s Campaign Team; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Republicans; Republican Party; Donald J. Trump’s Base
“You Can’t Get to Heaven on Roller Skates” by Betty Johnson

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
(Oh, you can’t get to Heaven)
On roller skates
(On roller skates)

You gotta work your way
(Gotta work your way)
To the pearly gates
(Those pearly gates)

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
On roller skates
Gotta work your way
To the pearly gates

And you gotta believe
If you wanna get in

[Chorus:]
Yes, you gotta believe
Believe, believe
Oh, you gotta believe
Believe, believe
Oh, you gotta believe
If you wanna get in

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
(Oh, you can’t get to Heaven)
With powder and paint
(With powder and paint)

‘Cause it makes you look
(Cause it makes you look)
Like what you ain’t
(Like what you ain’t)

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
With powder and paint
‘Cause it makes you look
Like what you ain’t

Oh, you gotta believe
If you wanna get in

[Repeat chorus]

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
(Oh, you can’t get to Heaven)
With a pot of gold
(With a pot of gold)

‘Cause nothing up there
(Cause nothing up there)
Is bought and sold
(Is bought and sold)

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
With a pot of gold
‘Cause nothing up there
Is bought and sold

Oh, you gotta believe
Oh, if you wanna get in

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
(Oh, you can’t get to Heaven)
On roller skates
(On roller skates)

You gotta work your way
(Gotta work your way)
To the pearly gates
(To the pearly gates)

Oh, you can’t get to Heaven
On roller skates
Gotta work your way
To the pearly gates

And you gotta believe
If you wanna get in

[Repeat chorus]

(If you wanna get in)

“Alternative” Lyrics 15

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Donald J. Trump’s Campaign Team; Donald J. Trump’s Administration (particularly family members on staff); Trump Family
“Bad Stuff Happens in the Bathroom” by H. Jon Benjamin and Kristen Schaal from Bob’s Burgers

Bad stuff happens in the bathroom
I’m just glad that it happens in a vacuum
Can’t let them see me with my pants down
Coasters Magazine is gonna be my chance now
But I’ll be outta here in no time
I’ll be doing interviews and feeling just fine
Today is gonna be a great day
I’ll do Coasters Magazine and blow everyone away

Let’s be clear
I did absolutely nothing wrong
I’m not to blame, it’s not my fault
This is just to say
If Gene had pooped like every day this would’ve all just blown away
But he’ll be outta there in no time
No-ones gonna blame me, I’ll be doing just fine
Today is gonna be a great day
If Teddy can’t unstick my dad I’ll find another way

Bad stuff happens in the bathroom/Let’s be clear
I’m just glad that it happens in a vacuum/I did absolutely nothing wrong I’m not to blame, it’s not my fault
Can’t let them see me with my pants down/This is just to say, if
Coasters Magazine is gonna be my chance now/Gene had pooped like every day this would’ve all just blown away
But I’ll be outta here in no time/But he’ll be outta there in no time
I’ll be doing interviews and feeling just fine/No-ones gonna blame me, I’ll be doing just fine
Today is gonna be a great day/Today is gonna be a great day
I’ll do Coasters Magazine and blow everyone away/If Teddy can’t unstick my dad I’ll find another way

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