“Alternative” Lyrics 393

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Immigration and Customs Enforcement
“Pop Goes the Weasel” by Various

All around the cobbler’s bench
The monkey chased the weasel
The monkey thought ’twas all in fun
Pop — goes the weasel!
I’ve no time to wait and sigh,
No patience to wait ’til by and by.
So kiss me quick, I’m off, goodbye!
Pop — goes the weasel!

A penny for a spool of thread
A penny for a needle
That’s the way the money goes
Pop — goes the weasel!
You may try to sew and sew
And never make something regal
So roll it up and let it go
Pop — goes the weasel!

All around the cobbler’s bench
The monkey chased the weasel
The monkey thought ’twas all in fun
Pop — goes the weasel!
Pop — goes the weasel!

“Alternative” Lyrics 392

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; Donald J. Trump’s Campaign Team; Donald J. Trump’s Transition Team; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Former Members of Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Resistance
“Birdhouse in Your Soul” by They Might Be Giants

I’m your only friend
I’m not your only friend
But I’m a little glowing friend
But really I’m not actually your friend

But I am

Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch
Who watches over you
Make a little birdhouse in your soul
Not to put too fine a point on it
Say I’m the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul

I have a secret to tell
From my electrical well
It’s a simple message and I’m leaving out the whistles and bells
So the room must listen to me
Filibuster vigilantly
My name is blue canary one note spelled l-I-t-e
My story’s infinite
Like the Longines Symphonette it doesn’t rest

Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch
Who watches over you
Make a little birdhouse in your soul
Not to put too fine a point on it
Say I’m the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul

I’m your only friend
I’m not your only friend
But I’m a little glowing friend
But really I’m not actually your friend
But I am

There’s a picture opposite me
Of my primitive ancestry
Which stood on rocky shores and kept the beaches shipwreck free
Though I respect that a lot
I’d be fired if that were my job
After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts
Bluebird of friendliness
Like guardian angels its always near

Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch
Who watches over you
Make a little birdhouse in your soul
Not to put too fine a point on it
Say I’m the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul

(And while you’re at it
Keep the nightlight on inside the
Birdhouse in your soul)

Not to put too fine a point on it
Say I’m the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul

Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch (and while you’re at it)
Who watches over you (keep the nightlight on inside the)
Make a little birdhouse in your soul (birdhouse in your soul)

Not to put too fine a point on it
Say I’m the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul

Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch (and while you’re at it)
Who watches over you (keep the nightlight on inside the)
Make a little birdhouse in your soul (birdhouse in your soul)

Not to put too fine a point on it
Say I’m the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul

https://youtu.be/NhjSzjoU7OQ

“Alternative” Lyrics 389

Topic: Donald J. Trump
Auxiliary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; Natalia Veselnitskaya; Vladimir Putin; Russia; Donald J. Trump’s Campaign Team; Donald J. Trump’s Transition Team; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Former Members of Donald J. Trump’s Administration
Tertiary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Donald J. Trump’s Wives; Mistresses; Porn Stars; Rape Victims
“Another Saturday Night” by Sam Cooke

[Chorus: ]
Another Saturday night and I ain’t got nobody
I’ve got some money cause I just got paid
Now how I wish I had someone to talk to

I’m in an awful way

I got in town a month ago
I’ve seen a lot of girls since then
If I could meet ’em I could get ’em
But as yet I haven’t met ’em
That’s how I’m in the state I’m in

[Chorus]

Another fella told me
He had a sister who looked just fine
Instead of being my deliverance
She had a strange resemblance
To a cat named Frankenstein

[Chorus]

It’s hard on a fella
When he don’t know his way around
If I don’t find me a honey
To help me spend my money
I’m gonna have to blow this town

Another Saturday night and I ain’t got nobody
I’ve got some money cause I just got paid
Now how I wish I had someone to talk to
I’m in an awful way

Another Saturday night and I ain’t got nobody
I’ve got some money cause I just got paid
Now how I wish I had someone to talk to
I’m in an awful ooo
I’m in an awful way
He’s in an awful way

I’m in an awful ooo
I’m in an awful way
He’s in an awful way
I’m in an awful way

https://youtu.be/0O8m0mMDpHw

“Alternative” Lyrics 388

Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; Donald J. Trump’s Campaign; Donald J. Trump’s Transition Team; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Former Members of Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Resistance
“2AM” by Bear Hands

I would never ask you
To do something I wouldn’t do
I could never lose you
At least I’d never choose to

All your friends are sober
Yeah we’re getting older
Going out’s a drag now
All my spots have closed
And we can fantasize
Without much of a mess
And making love is fine
But all I want is to forget
How old I am

(Can’t remember anything else)
Nothing good happens past two a.m.
I put the ball in your court
Text me back
I want a full report
I want cash in hand
I’m still waiting for my man
(Has he even left the house?)
Short a couple dollars but I think he’ll understand
I put my best dress on, get back in bed
Nothing good happens past two a.m.

Can’t turn back, it’s too late
I saw you drink the Kool-Aid
But I don’t want no undue
Attention coming from you

All your friends are sober
Yeah we’re getting older
Staying in at home
It’s good enough for both us
Free to fantasize
Without hearing “I told ya”
Making love is fine
But all I want is to forget
How old I am

(Can’t remember anything else)
Nothing good happens past two a.m.
I put the ball in your court
Text me back
I want a full report
I want cash in hand
I’m still waiting for my man
(Has he even left the house?)
Short a couple dollars but I think he’ll understand
I put my best dress on, get back in bed
Nothing good happens past two a.m.

And what I thought was possible don’t seem possible no more
I struggle to keep up with you
And what I thought was possible don’t seem possible no more
I never could keep up with you
Can we forget how old I am?

(Can’t remember anything else)
Nothing good happens past two a.m.
I put the ball in your court
Text me back
I want a full report
I want cash in hand
I’m still waiting for my man
(Has he even left the house?)
Twenty-seven years young don’t make sense
I put my best dress on, get back in bed
Nothing good happens past two a.m.

Amen

“Alternative” Lyrics 385

Topic: Donald J. Trump
Auxiliary Topic: Donald J. Trump; Republicans; Republican Party; Donald J. Trump’s Administration; Donald J. Trump’s Base
“A Place Called Slaughter Race” by Sarah Silverman from Ralph Breaks the Internet

[Intro: Sarah Silverman]
What can it be that calls me to this place today?
This lawless car ballet
What can it be?
Am I a baby pigeon, sprouting wings to soar?
Was that a metaphor?
Hey, there’s a Dollar Store
Look, I’m rhyming;
My spirit’s climbing
As I’m called through this fog of mace
To this place called Slaughter Race

[Verse: Cast of Ralph Breaks the Internet, Gal Gadot, & Sarah Silverman]
Welcome back, watch your head
Hate to see you end up dead
Let’s get this party rolling
Is that appliance stolen?
We have
Fallen wires, dumpster fires, creepy clowns, and burning tires
That great white in the sewer
You’ll be happy that you knew her (Fin bump)
Dogs and cats, they sure taste great
With a side of license plate
Some flag us deplorable
Well, I think you’re adorable
We may be a motley crew, but our hearts ring true
And just for you, a face tattoo

[Interlude: Cast of Ralph Breaks the Internet]
Ah, Slaughter Race, ooh-ooh-oh

[Bridge: Sarah Silverman, Gal Gadot, & Both]
My heart’s in flight, and, wow, it’s a blast
Feels like my dreams are real at last
No trace of a frown upon your face
Flying so fast
Setting the pace
Living the life
Loving the chase
Now is the time
Here is the place
This Slaughter Race

[Outro: Sarah Silverman & Cast of Ralph Breaks the Internet]
I know I should go
But home feels so slow
These roads are paved with dreams
Happy dreams, not creepy clown dreams
What would Ralph say if it turns out I stay
In this place called Slaughter Race?
In this place called Slaughter Race

https://youtu.be/SNq4VxhzaoQ

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